Los cucarachas de senior Edward...

An epic story of bravery, cowardice, and hysteria...

I'll begin my tale on a windy cloudy day at Mudville...oh yes, the famed Mudville,
(A Ballad of the Republic. Sung in the Year 1888)
And just like the Mudville nine, the outlook wasn't brilliant for Corporate Kerri and Shana Nasty that day.
Lunch wasnt swell, it was sweltering...
thats the heat of room and the sweat inducing meal
and precisely where we begin this gruesome tale...

While the wings were scorching and the beer hardly cooled,
The infamous duo soon realized they had just missed their school.
Alas another day without class and excuses,
but a perfect situation in which to introduce the ice pack on bruises.
For instead of coming to class late and dumb
the duo would prepare for the next week to come.

The irony hit when a text message sent
"we're at edwards, us two" and to edwards they went.
The message from Slopey and Brens at her side
How funny missing class the other duo in their tribe.
Notorious for missing classes and drinking as well
these four came together in their tendancies to rebel.

Into edwards they walked just in time to buy beer
without a clue about the little friend who would soon appear.
As Slopey and brens at soup with some corn
Corporate Kerri seemed to regard them with some scorn
"i've never like this place", she said with a look of contempt
but to chill and relax the tribe would attempt.

Unfortunatley for Brens, the little friend did appear
so creepy it was that it nearly braised her ear.
Alas corporate kerri so swift and so bold
Probably her haberdasher kept her so controlled.
She picked up a napkin and watched as he ran
and as she went to squish him he lept out of her hand.

Suddenlly, a loud shriek, heard right round the land
from little Slopey, who knew? her voice had such command.
The whole restaurant stopped, two angry men in the corner
while the waitress just smiled and continued to take our order.
If you can imagine, this was calm, while Nasty just stood,
amazed that her friend just screamed as loud as she could.

Moments later all were calm and they continued to converse
but of course conversation took a turn for the worse
Horror stories of spiders and roaches galore
Until all four of the tribe stood shook to the core.
And just as the conversation grew much more frightening
till all four sat feeling their skin bumpy and crawling

Suddenly, a gaze, more like a look of disgust
From Shana Nasty, something serious thought Slopey, serious a must
For she glared eyes wide open, mouth dropped to the floor
and the next thing you knew Shana sprinted for the door.
Hardly breathing just running the door handle in sight
Shana Nasty cared for nothing save escaping her fright.

Slopey P not so calm as some thought she could be
Instead she ran too, screaming and jumping wildly.
No one knew what had happened a simple glance and a stare
But the entire restaurant stopped to see what was there.
Entire, I lie, as Ker and Brens simply sat
thinking nothing of the madness they had just witnessed pass.

But the horror continued outside on the street
Shana Nasty running for life chased by Slopey P.
"Shaaayyyeeennnaa! WHERE IS IT WHERE ON EARTH COULD IT BE"
screamed Slopes as she undressed right there in the street
The little child and his mother stopped and just stared
as Shana ran wildly chased by Slopes deathly scared.

Finally Shana gave up and came to her aid
found nothing on Slopes who felt incredibly betrayed.
"Dont get it on me" screamed Shana just minutes before
Slopey simply didnt have it in her to forgive her friend anymore.
Embarrased and shy the two slumped back into edwards
Everyone staring loudly while the two just stared onwards.

"What was it?" grumbled Ker as she looked with distaste
And Brens had been shook you could see it in her face.
"i saw it I SWEAR, right there on her chest"
screamed Shana who at this point appeard quite a mess.
"You lie, its not true" said Ker with conviction
"It makes perfect sense, must have come out of the kitchen"

After apologies and hysterics the tribe simply laughed
How funny yet sad this predicament passed.
"Never again" said Corporate Ker and the tribe just agreed
"Never again" it is true, though the memory will succeed.
Thus the tale it must end, no cocroaches on her shirt
But forever this memory engrained and they laughed till it hurt.